Posts Tagged ‘clitoris’

Things that Make Me Mad: Crave Wink

Alright, Crave. I was willing to give you a chance, even though the first iteration of your Duet looked like a clitoral torture device, and even though Epiphora slaughtered it. You changed the designs and came out with two new toys: The Wink and the Solo. So, I thought maybe you’d gotten it together.

NOPE. Nope nope nope. Let me tell you about some things.

First of all, I will admit that I think that the Crave Wink is adorable. It’s super cute. It looks like a Clinique Almost Lipstick. Also, it’s made out of silicone and metal, which gives it a nice weight and makes it feel expensive. (Heads up, it is expensive: $69.) I chose the coral shade, because it looks even more like lipstick that way and I’m predictable. The material choices and the aesthetic value are the only good things about this vibrator. Put your wallets away right now.

Let me tell you about something that is not a “feature”: Having to twist the battery compartment into place to turn the damn thing on and off. That is not a feature. That is a design flaw. That is lazy. For $69, I want a button. What else do I want? More than one speed. You’re playing this JimmyJane Little Chroma game, and I do not appreciate it. Edit: I forgot to mention this explicitly… it takes one AAA battery. Nothing has ever been powerful, powered by a single AAA battery.

I would absolutely be willing to look past the one speed issue if that one speed were pleasing. It isn’t. It’s like bees. The metal base conducts vibration to the point where my fingers began to go numb after a few minutes. The silicone tip buzzed, but didn’t rumble, and try as I might to come, it was not happening. It actually felt like something was tickling my clit instead of actually trying to pleasurably stimulate it. I tried so hard just to see if I could have an orgasm from this monstrosity. I’m not even a power queen, but I ended up angrily dropping it off the side of my bed and reaching for my trusty WeVibe Touch. (For whatever it isn’t, the Wink truly is durable.)

In the two years that I’ve been reviewing, there have been very few products that I’ve just out and out hated. This is one of them. Say what you will about the appearance of the WeVibe Touch, but at least it works. It does what it’s supposed to do, and it does it very, very well. The Wink is a pretty toy, but it’s as though the care that went into making it stopped there. I was so excited to try this toy, and it was a total letdown. Did anyone with fingers and a clitoris try this in its testing stages? If so, had any of them tried a good vibrator before? It makes me so sad to think that, if this was someone’s first toy, they might never venture beyond it.

In order to clean the Wink, you need to first remove the battery, then twist the two halves together. It is waterproof, which is nice, and the material choices make it easy to clean. Just grab some dish soap, toy cleaner, or 10% bleach solution, and go to town. But, if you want an external vibe that’s waterproof and legitimately a luxury product, consider the WeVibe Touch or the Lelo Mia 2 instead.

In the end, I want to bandy someone about the head with the Crave Wink and tell them to step up their game.

Thank you, SheVibe!

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50/50 Split: Namaste Harmony by CalEx

Once again, many thanks to SheVibe for their patience and generosity! I was originally sent this vibe months ago, and I could not decide how I felt about it. It was such a head scratcher that I skipped over it and even reviewed a few other toys first.

So, what do I think about the California Exotics Namaste Harmony? I’m cautiously optimistic about the direction of their company. Known for being a “novelties” brand – think grape scented jelly double dongs – CalEx doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in me. But it’s not exactly easy for most people to drop $100+ on a vibrator, either. Is the Harmony worth its mid-range $46 price tag? It depends.

I was initially drawn to the Harmony because it reminded me of the Leaf Life, a quiet, beautiful toy by Swan. Harmony has a similar shape, but with a wider tip at either end. The thing is, Harmony is considerably bigger. While Harmony is 5″ long and 2.25″ wide, Life is only 4.1″ long and 1.6″ wide. Harmony is not much of a pinpoint toy, because its tips are rounded, unlike Life’s pointed ends. These aren’t good or bad things: simply differences in design and execution.

Now, really, Harmony is buzzy. It’s on the stronger end of buzzy, and the materials (ABS plastic, PU, with a silicone button), conduct vibration well. Because it’s so buzzy, if you have a strong grip or you have a partner who tends to clutch toys for dear life, you might dampen the vibrations significantly. Its 3 straight vibration settings go from what I would call medium to high to intense. If you like to barely graze your skin with the sensation, this would probably be a fantastic option for you, since the vibrations conduct nicely at surface-level. Another unfortunate side effect of buzzy vibrations from a toy of this material: it’s loud. Room-mate disturbing loud, but not neighbors disturbing loud. Is it college dorm appropriate? No. Would it would for someone living in your average apartment complex or town house? Yes.

Where Harmony really has the chance to shine is in the fine detail of its curvature. For me personally, the curve was perfect for clitoral stimulation. It sort of created a surrounding effect, making the vibrations feel more intense. I was actually surprised by how great it felt.

Harmony is rechargeable, which is fantastically convenient. I very rarely consider trying battery-operated toys because I just never keep batteries around the house. (I’m terrible at being an adult.) It comes with a USB cable and a wall adapter (for US outlets). The thing I found very puzzling about Harmony’s packaging is that it comes with a magnetic cover for one side of the toy. In the picture on SheVibe’s website, the toy looks like a yin and yang symbol, or Free Willy. That white part actually detaches. Why? I’m not 100% sure. It might be for perceived cleanliness, might be to hide the USB portal, might be for style. Who knows? I almost lost it 3 separate times while working on this review.

In conclusion, answer the following questions if you’re considering purchasing a Harmony.

1. Do you love the shape of Leaf Life but can’t afford it, want a bigger toy, or are happy spending $50 but not $100? (Worth it.)

2. Is this your first clitoral vibe? Are you on a mid-range budget ($30 – $75), and does this shape appeal to you more than a lipstick style? (Worth it.)

3. Do you own a MiMi, a Mia, a Mystic Wand, or a Salsa/Tango? Are you satisfied with it? (Nope. Go buy tequila.)

Thanks so much, SheVibe!

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Vibratex Mystic Wand

Because 2013 has really taken off for me, you’re going to be seeing a LOT more toy reviews! I’m so lucky to be working with some amazing companies, and one of them is Vibratex.

Fun fact: Vibratex made the Rabbit that was featured in the iconic Sex and the City episode, in which Miranda (not Samantha) introduces the ladies to their new dual-action friend. I actually hate rabbits, and that’s neither here nor there. What we’re talking about today is not a rabbit, but the Mystic Wand.

If you’re familiar with the Hitachi Magic Wand, the Mystic Wand shape is already familiar to you. It has a 6″ long handle that’s easy to grip and comes in either pink or black. Where the Mystic Wand really sets itself apart from the Hitachi is its materials. The head of the Mystic Wand is made out of silicone, and has a lovely smooth texture. Usually, I prefer rechargeable toys, because I just don’t have my shit together enough to keep batteries on hand. However, I love that the Mystic Wand takes 4 AA batteries – usually, to find power like the kind it provides, you have to use plug-in toys. Plus, you get 3 speeds and 3 vibration patterns, instead of the Hitachi’s 2 speeds.

Right off the bat, I was amazed by the power. Speed 1 is rumbly, you can actually feel the head of the vibrator shake. Speeds 2 and 3 are noticeably stronger, and actually proved to be too much for me. I’m not big on vibration patterns, but the Mystic Wand comes with 3. Not too shabby at all.

Now, unfortunately, I’ve discovered that I absolutely need pinpoint clitoral vibration. The strength of the Mystic Wand cannot be beat by any of my smaller vibes, but the shape just doesn’t work for my body. I actually find that the strength of the vibrations when they’re spread out across the vulva to be a little distracting. I tried several different hand grips trying to make pinpoint contact with my clit to no avail.

However, I still would recommend this toy if you fit any of these descriptions: If you like to be able to feel vibrations in your labia. If you need a toy that packs one hell of a punch. If you’re a Hitachi devotee and you want something smaller, easier to travel with, or less restrictive. If you have used/currently use massager-style, non-pinpoint vibrators with orgasmic success.

If the Mystic Wand sounds like it might fit your bill, you can purchase one from SheVibe for $49.99.

Thanks so much, Vibratex!

Oh, YES: Vibratex Tulip Mini

If you have a clitoris, you need this vibrator.

When I received the Vibratex Tulip Mini (henceforth, the Tulip), I was expecting to enjoy it.  What actually happened?  I was blown away.  I need to include a picture of the Tulip, because otherwise, it’s going to be very hard to explain what’s so special about this little wand-style clitoral vibrator.

The entire toy is only 6″ long, with those petals making up about 1.5″ of overall length.  The petals themselves are made of soft, velvety, flexible silicone, and they surround a bullet coated in pink silicone in the middle of the wand’s head.  The effect is pinpoint stimulation combined with fluttering petals, which in my opinion combines the two best methods of clitoral stim.

Using the Tulip is very easy.  The base (which brilliantly allows the wand to stand up by itself) easily twists off, and you then load 2 AAA batteries into the compartment.  The presence of a dedicated ON/OFF button is welcome – far too few toys have one.  The other button allows you to cycle through 6 functions, but honestly, I only ever had to use the first 2 speeds.

While in use, I actually had to back off my orgasm a few times because I wanted to continue using the toy.  This was on the first vibration mode, which is a low, steady rumble.  This toy is really shockingly powerful and effective.  Every time I used it, I needed about 10 minutes and settings 1-2.  That’s it, and it was guaranteed bliss.

If you’re looking for an amazing clitoral vibe, or if you want to try a new combination of sensations, I highly recommend the Vibratex Tulip Mini.  At $25.99 from SheVibe.com, it’s a steal.  Thanks, SheVibe!

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