When UberKinky approached me about reviewing, I had my hesitations. I’m not exactly the kinkiest of people. I love sex toys, obviously, but it doesn’t get too much more interesting than that. But after speaking with their affiliate and review director, I decided to give it a shot since there are a wide range of products available on their website. For my first review, I chose the Monarch Noir Nipple Clamps.

Monarch Noir Nipple Clamps

Big mistake.

You see, these clamps are called Monarch because this style of clamp is called a butterfly clamp. Sounds nice, but in reality, they exert a lot more pressure on your nipples than the softer alligator clamps. (This is so backwards. Everything I learned about context clues is useless here.)

Generally, I’m not a huge fan of nipple play. To get a little dark for a second, it reminds me of some abuse that I dealt with as a teen. But I’ve wanted to pierce my nipples for a few years now, so I thought clamps might be a nice introduction to nipple pain. I was both right and wrong. Introduction? Yes. Nice? Not so much. It turns out I really do not enjoy the type of stimulation that these provide.

However, that’s not to say I think they’re a bad addition to your sex life. They’re inexpensive, so you can explore a sensation that might be new to you without committing to a hefty price tag. I’m not an expert on clamps, but they appear to be nicely made. The design is straightforward, sexy, and easy to use. If you have a pair or two of tweezer or alligator style clamps that you enjoy and you’re looking for something a little more powerful, I would definitely recommend these.

You can also read more about how to use nipple clamps here. I love that UberKinky includes informative articles in their shop! As far as I’m concerned, education is a must for kink.

Thanks so much, UberKinky!